The Sunday morning service at a Christian church had just ended. I had just finished my mission as the pulpiteer of the day. My message had been about stepping out of the pulpit and pews and closing the gap of separation between our words and actions. Our lives should reflect a message of love and neighborliness that's evident on the mountaintops and experienced in the valleys. I left the pulpit and sat down in the back of the old bar that now serves as a church. Pastor Jimmy had just closed the service with a prayer when a lady in front asked:
"Pastor,
what does God
say about gay people?"
There was a slight pause and a momentary collection of breath and thoughts before he responded. He gave the obligatory Biblical response that most Christians give regarding God's view of homosexuality which is negative. The Bible has several portions of references to homosexuality including Romans 1:26-27 from The Message:
Worse followed. Refusing to know God, they soon didn’t know how to be human either—women didn’t know how to be women, men didn’t know how to be men. Sexually confused, they abused and defiled one another, women with women, men with men—all lust, no love. And then they paid for it, oh, how they paid for it—emptied of God and love, godless and loveless wretches.
Some folks jump on the anti-gay bandwagon with that verse and plaster judgmental bumper stickers on their hearts. Before they get too comfortable in their snugly fitting robes of haughtiness, they might want to keep reading through to Romans 2 also from The Message:
Those people are on a dark spiral downward. But if you think that leaves you on the high ground where you can point your finger at others, think again. Every time you criticize someone, you condemn yourself. It takes one to know one. Judgmental criticism of others is a well-known way of escaping detection in your own crimes and misdemeanors. But God isn’t so easily diverted. He sees right through all such smoke screens and holds you to what you’ve done.
Two young ladies were sitting next to me in the back of this bar turned into a church. They listened in disagreement to the words of Pastor Jimmy. I remembered that during my discourse about showing love to everybody, one of the girls made it a point to let me know that they were in a "relationship." Pastor Jimmy finished his explanation and began to wrap up the service. The girls next to me were shaking their heads in disagreement. I asked them if maybe there was a more excellent way than being gay?
"I was born a lesbian." Was the reply from the more vocal of the two. I asked her about her relationship with her father and she became a bit rancorous and said never mind her father, he wasn't in her life. She said she had a good relationship with her step dad. I asked her if she felt she struggled with abandonment issues. She said no and then added that all guys break your heart. I told her that it sounded like her emotional woundedness may have caused her sexual orientation.
In the natural order of humanity, it is a relationship between a man and a woman that promulgate the species. We talked about the natural way of humanity. I asked her a question: "Could it be that the natural love between a man and a woman is the true nature of humanity and a more excellent way of love?"
I have friends who are gay and people that I love dearly who are in gay relationships. I have told them that I could not love them anymore if they were in a straight relationship. My love for them is not dictated by their sexual orientation. Many gay people that I know have experienced emotional and or sexual trauma. Fractured families with missing or emotionally dead parents have caused children to seek the approval of the same sex. Sexual trauma is a wound that affects both gay and straight people. Unhealed emotional wounds caused by sexual trauma can distort the true beauty of sexual joy experienced in a loving relationship between a man and a woman.
Is it healthy to make a choice regarding sexual partners based on a deep and unhealed wound? Nobody, gay or straight should think about entering into a relationship unless they are healed emotionally. I always urge people to have a heart to heart chat with God about their sexuality. It is not my responsibility to convince or convert anybody to my belief system. The way I read it, the more excellent way seems to be the natural way. All relationships will struggle. Most people will struggle regarding sexuality in some manner. Healing through openness and honesty can be accomplished through compassionate, nonjudgmental listening.
You deserve the best in life. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. God picked you for first string on his team. Expect the best. Don't settle for a future life that may be dictated by your wounded past. We need to open up more compassionate dialogues with God and ask him to heal our wounds.
He answers prayer.
"I was born a lesbian." Was the reply from the more vocal of the two. I asked her about her relationship with her father and she became a bit rancorous and said never mind her father, he wasn't in her life. She said she had a good relationship with her step dad. I asked her if she felt she struggled with abandonment issues. She said no and then added that all guys break your heart. I told her that it sounded like her emotional woundedness may have caused her sexual orientation.
In the natural order of humanity, it is a relationship between a man and a woman that promulgate the species. We talked about the natural way of humanity. I asked her a question: "Could it be that the natural love between a man and a woman is the true nature of humanity and a more excellent way of love?"
I have friends who are gay and people that I love dearly who are in gay relationships. I have told them that I could not love them anymore if they were in a straight relationship. My love for them is not dictated by their sexual orientation. Many gay people that I know have experienced emotional and or sexual trauma. Fractured families with missing or emotionally dead parents have caused children to seek the approval of the same sex. Sexual trauma is a wound that affects both gay and straight people. Unhealed emotional wounds caused by sexual trauma can distort the true beauty of sexual joy experienced in a loving relationship between a man and a woman.
Is it healthy to make a choice regarding sexual partners based on a deep and unhealed wound? Nobody, gay or straight should think about entering into a relationship unless they are healed emotionally. I always urge people to have a heart to heart chat with God about their sexuality. It is not my responsibility to convince or convert anybody to my belief system. The way I read it, the more excellent way seems to be the natural way. All relationships will struggle. Most people will struggle regarding sexuality in some manner. Healing through openness and honesty can be accomplished through compassionate, nonjudgmental listening.
You deserve the best in life. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. God picked you for first string on his team. Expect the best. Don't settle for a future life that may be dictated by your wounded past. We need to open up more compassionate dialogues with God and ask him to heal our wounds.
He answers prayer.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds
[curing their pains and their sorrows].
Psalm 147:3 Amplified Bible
Thanks for your time. Go do something nice for somebody.
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